


Spellbound and Speechless

by DejaBoo



Category: Gravity Falls
Genre: Action, Alternate Universe - Fairy Tale, Alternate Universe - Fantasy, Fluff, Humor, M/M, Mage!Ford and Swordsman!Stan, a little bit of, request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-30
Updated: 2020-07-30
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:35:15
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 9,511
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25617451
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DejaBoo/pseuds/DejaBoo
Summary: “Legend tells of an ancient land stranger and more fantastical than any place else. Impossible creatures roam her mountains. Serpentine in her lake, old and powerful in the depths of her caves, benevolent and malevolent in chaotic harmony. Deadly and divine secrets are whispered betwixt the trees of her forests. Those who wander there come to know. They come so that they might know the things she knows; that none other can reveal. May the curious traveler beware! The promise of her magic comes at the risk of treachery. Be not fooled by the charmer lead by falsehoods, by the charlatan disguised as an afflatus. With the will and determination of a strong heart, the beauty of her earth may be reaped, the earth known as Gravity Falls."
Relationships: Ford Pines/Stan Pines
Comments: 6
Kudos: 23





	Spellbound and Speechless

**Author's Note:**

  * For [caliowl](https://archiveofourown.org/users/caliowl/gifts).



> This fic was requested by caliowl who wanted a Stancest Fairytale. This is my first AU fic, it was ridiculously fun to write and I was so inspired by the idea that this ended up being the longest fic I've ever written! Your prompt really allowed me to flex my creative muscles and I really enjoyed using fairytale and fantasy tropes as it's one of my favorite settings.
> 
> Thank you so much again! You've been nothing but kind and I really hope you enjoy it <3

“Legend tells of an ancient land stranger and more fantastical than any place else. Impossible creatures roam her mountains. Serpentine in her lake, old and powerful in the depths of her caves, benevolent and malevolent in chaotic harmony. Deadly and divine secrets are whispered betwixt the trees of her forests. Those who wander there come to know. They come so that they might know the things she knows; that none other can reveal. May the curious traveler beware! The promise of her magic comes at the risk of treachery. Be not fooled by the charmer lead by falsehoods, by the charlatan disguised as an afflatus. With the will and determination of a strong heart, the beauty of her earth may be reaped, the earth known as Gravity Falls. 

The origin of this wondrous land—” 

“Yeah, yeah, I’ve heard this part a hundred times already. The kooky nonsense about the shifty guys from another planet, I know.” Stan interrupts his brother with a dismissive wave of his hand. 

Ford sighs. “While I know these scrolls are certainly very old and I am reluctant to believe all of it myself, it is far from nonsense, Stanley. It isn’t farfetched to assume that the strange properties of this land are the result of some kind of outside influence, and these scrolls present a solid, albeit rudimentary, hypothesis.” 

“Yeesh, okay, okay, maybe give it a rest with the nerd talk.” 

Stanford merely hummed in response, with his nose already back in the scrolls. Stan rolled his eyes but couldn't help smiling a bit at how excited Ford was today. They were getting closer to Gravity Falls by the day and now they only had a day left to walk before reaching it. 

“Almost there...” Stan muttered thoughtfully. “It is kinda exciting.” 

“Of course it’s exciting!” The smile on Ford’s face was huge and contagious. “Gravity Falls supposedly has the highest concentration of mana in the known world meaning I can practice all kinds of new spells, more potent and powerful than any I’ve done yet. Any practicing Mage would be thrilled to visit such a place.” He says, proudly clutching his spell staff. “However, that isn’t he only aspect of Gravity Falls that’s so alluring to me. There’s another element that I find perhaps even more fascinating.” 

“What was it again?” He already knew, but Ford’s charmingly childlike enthusiasm was infectious, so he humored him. 

“Weirdness.” Stanford’s grin was almost devilish. “Gravity Falls appears to be a place where anomalies are drawn. I can’t help but feel as if we were bound to end up in Gravity Falls. Though I usually don’t put any faith in things like fate, perhaps I miraculously found these rare scrolls and was driven to come here because I myself am an anomaly.” 

Stanford looks down at his six-fingered hands and he smiles. Stan feels such incredible amount of relief at Ford’s expression. He can’t remember a time Ford had ever looked at his hands with anything other than insecurity or downright shame. He clasps Ford’s shoulder affectionately. 

“Yeah, and who knows, maybe the whole town’ll have six fingers.” 

Stanford laughs, the sound bright and easy. Stan laughs with him and a warm feeling constricts in his chest that he promptly ignores. 

“Ha ha, well, the likelihood of that is rather slim, but I think at least the townsfolk won’t be fazed by it considering the sights they must witness on a daily basis.” 

It was clear to Stan that part of the reason Ford was so excited to come to Gravity Falls is because he felt he wouldn’t have to hide part of himself anymore. He hoped Ford was right. 

“The best part, however, and I’m sure you’ll agree,” Ford continued. “is getting to visit the children.” He concluded with a fond smile. 

“Sure, s’long as those knuckleheads don’t get themselves into any trouble,” he lets out a long-suffering sigh but fails to hide the affection in his voice, “but knowing them...” 

They both chuckle knowingly before falling into a tranquil silence as they continue down the path. It had been too long since they’d seen those two. It was honestly miraculous their parents had agreed to send them up for the summer and Stan was certain they must be unaware of the place’s reputation. Their carriage was to arrive in Gravity Falls today where Soos, having dutifully gone to find them all a place to stay as soon as he heard word of it, was to greet them. 

So, even though this was their first time in Gravity Falls, knowing what was waiting for them, it somehow felt like coming home. Looking at the same content smile he was wearing mirrored on Ford’s face; Stan knew he was thinking the same thing. 

Drip. 

The twins stop in their tracks and look up. 

A raindrop falls on Stan’s face. Then another and another. 

“Uh, we should...” 

Stan’s voice is cut off by booming thunder. They both jump and waste no time continuing down the trail with a rushed pace. In an instant, sheets of rain drench the two as they quicken their pace further. Stanford hurriedly pulls out a map, using his cloak to awkwardly avoid getting the map wet as he runs. 

“There should be a cave up ahead.” He states loudly against the vicious wind that was suddenly trying to knock them off their feet. 

Stan could barely see as the rain had already blurred his glasses. He tries to look ahead and nearly stumbles only avoiding falling on his face because his brother grabbed him by his sleeve and led him along. He blindly follows his brother’s lead until he apparently finds the cave as the deluge of rain stops as suddenly as it started. 

“What the hell?!” Stan barks as he ineffectively brushes the rain off his shoulder and tears his glasses off to try to clean them. “Where’d that come from?!” 

“I don’t—” Ford cuts himself off and does a double take at the sky. Then he smiles. “Actually, I think I might know the culprit.” 

Stan follows his line of sight and almost doesn’t see it at first. He sees a black dot in the clouds and squints in confusion. The black dot gets closer and he can make out its form. 

“Wuzzat, a crow?” Stan fails to see why a little crow would have anything to do wi—oh god, wait it’s definitely not little, it’s gigantic and, oh god, oh god, it’s coming toward the cave—! 

The gigantic bird swoops up just in front of the cave entrance with an ear-piercing, mighty cry. With a powerful flap of its wings, it creates a blast of wind so great both twins have to brace themselves against the walls of the cave to avoid being thrown onto their backs. It loops around in the air and tendrils of thick lightning strikes shoot out from its glossy, black wings. 

As soon as Stan gains his composure somewhat from the beautiful and powerful display, he grips the hilt of the sword at his waist and assumes a battle stance. Surely, that must have been the creature’s way of declaring battle. Stan’s face turns serious as he casts a look to his brother who is— 

—smiling like an idiot. 

“It greeted us!” 

“What?! Is that what that was?” 

Sure enough the beast of a bird was now flying in the opposite direction as if already uninterested in them. 

“That was a Thunderbird, Stanley! It’s such a rare sight to see, that’s how you know we’re getting close to Gravity Falls! I wish I would have gotten the chance to give it a closer look,” he says with disappointment as the majestic creature disappears behind the towering mountains in the distance. 

Though the cause of the storm had disappeared, the storm itself remained. 

“Well, since it looks like the storm won’t be stopping anytime soon. We’ll have to take this route,” Ford says gesturing to the pitch-black depths of the cave. 

The darkness is no problem for him as he takes out his staff and whispers a spell to it. A flame materializes, hovering above the end of the staff creating a torch. 

“This cave turns into a tunnel system that leads straight to Gravity Falls. However, this route is a lot more unpredictable and riskier as the tunnels are rumored to be teeming with magical anomalies.” 

After hearing that explanation Stan pauses for a beat. 

“You were gonna make us go this way anyway weren’tcha?” 

Ford doesn’t reply, but his guilty smile is answer enough. 

~ 

“What, you weren’t actually going to try to fight a Thunderbird, were you?” 

“I mean if push had come to shove, hell yeah I would’ve—” 

“Oh, Stanley—” 

“What?! We could’ve taken it together.” 

“It shoots lightning!” 

“So do you! From your little magic wand—” 

“It’s a staff, and—” 

“We’ve taken down harder shit than that.” 

“...” Ford scoffs. “That’s debatable!” 

“Uh, no it ain’t. Motherfucking dragon, remember that shit?” 

“We didn’t even defeat it! We made friends with it before the fight ended and it took us to its den for tea and scones, remember?” 

“We-… oh yeah...” 

“Anyway, it doesn’t matter. The Thunderbird is an incredibly noble creature and fighting it would have been terribly dishonorable.” 

“I understand this now, but—! If it wasn’t… we coulda taken it, easy.” Stan continues though Ford is vehemently shaking his head. “Yeah we coulda! The two of us... together... you know th-the tumble twins.” 

Ford snorts and stifles a chuckle with his hand. 

“What? No one calls us that. You’ve never even—I've never even heard that!” 

The two chuckle to themselves and playfully elbow each other in the side, and amidst their light-hearted banter they don’t notice the change in the cave’s atmosphere. Ford does not notice at first the mana in the air getting thicker nor the movement in the shadows around them. 

He stops when he sees something out of the corner of his eye. They both wait and listen and are about to just write it off as some cave bats when they hear what sounds like a creature flitting by. Ford shines his torch to the right where the sound was coming from. Then he hears it pass behind them, then above them, and suddenly it sounds like its coming from every direction at once. 

“Something’s coming.” Stanley says wasting no time unsheathing his sword. 

“It sounds like there’s more than o—” Ford suddenly jumps and sputters on his words. 

He looks at Stan with an utterly scandalized look on his face, and Stanley quirks an eyebrow in confusion. 

“Stanley!” He snaps with an odd blush on his face only adding to Stan’s confusion. “Did-did you just pinch my butt?” He hisses out. 

“What?! No!” 

Ford had unmistakably felt a hand on his backside, but if it wasn’t Stan’s... suddenly Ford feels something crawling up his back. He startles and tries to brush it off to no avail. It swiftly skitters up to his neck, then onto his chest, and his arm where he finally manages to grab it and throw it to the ground. 

“Ah! What the hell is that thing?” 

Ford shines his torch over the thing that was now twitching on the ground. It takes him a moment to comprehend just what it is he’s seeing, and when he finally does, he blanches. 

“It appears to be... a severed hand.” 

“Eugh! Why is it moving?” Stan steps back with a look of disgust. 

The hand on the ground struggles on its back to get back on its fingers. It squirms until it rights itself, and it scurries away on its fingers as if they were little legs. Ford follows it with his light as it crawls away and when it starts up the wall both twin’s eyes widen at what they see. 

“Well, these were not the kinds of anomalies I was expecting.” 

The wall was pulsating and squirming and alive. It was covered completely in sickly looking detached hands. 

Out of nowhere they hear someone whistle on the other side of the cave. All the hands immediately drop down and hurry in the direction of the sound. A wave of hands rushes past their feet, Stan uses his sword more like a fly swatter to smack them away from himself. 

Ford turns to see the whistle had come from an old lady as sickly looking as the hands. Her skin had an unnatural off-green hue, she was wall-eyed, and appeared to have hands for feet. 

“Hello boys~” The old crone crooned. The hands had come together to form a lounge chair on top of which she was laying on her side casually. She inspected her long, yellowed nails. “What brings such a handsome traveler ‘round these parts?” She asks in a low, gravelly voice as she bats her eyelashes at Ford. 

“Ah, hello.” Stanford awkwardly smiles and waves. He tries to ignore the way the woman stares at his hand and continues, “We were just passing through on our way to Gravity Falls. It wasn’t our intention to intrude. We’ll just be on our way—” 

“Hey, hey, what’s the hurry?” She cuts him off. She snaps her fingers and the hands form chairs behind the twins. Two hands shove their chests, making them roughly sit down. “Why don’t you relax for a bit? You must be weary from your long journey. Why don’t we have a drink and get to know each other?” Hands holding wine glasses and a bottle of champagne bounce up to them giving them each a glass and a fill. 

“Actually, lady, we’re kind of in a hurry—” 

“As your gracious host I must insist. It would be terribly rude of me to not at least offer my guests a drink.” She interrupts again earning an annoyed glare from Stan. 

“Now, let’s not waste anytime beating around the bush.” Her chair hands bring her up uncomfortably close in Ford’s personal space. “The elephant in the room: my outrageously extensive collection of human hands. Heh heh, well, it started out as hobby, and then it became this whole thing, you know how it is,” she went on twirling a strand of hair in her fingers. “People started calling me the Hand Witch and I just kind of went with it at first, but now...” 

Stan groaned and checked his nonexistent watch, but his rude disinterest didn’t seem to faze her in the least as she went on about herself for what seemed like hours. Ford nodded along with a strained smile hoping she would end soon. 

“...Anyway, enough about me.” Both twins sigh in relief. “You! I couldn’t help but notice your hands. Six fingers, hubba bubba!” She growls suggestively, and Ford laughs stiffly as he is made deeply uncomfortable in an instant. “You know those babies really interest a serious collector such as myself, so hows about I make you an offer? I’ll trade you for 'em, you can take any other pair in the cave.” 

Ford stutters in shock. 

“Or~” A hand suddenly drops down from the ceiling onto Ford’s head with a fleshy smack. The hand begins combing its fingers through his hair. “You could just stay here. Your hands aren’t the only part of you I’m interested in. Wink~" 

“Okay! We are done here!” Stan yells, abruptly getting up. He roughly grabs Ford by the arm and hauls him up, dragging him away. 

“But what’s your answer?!” 

“I—” 

“He’s not interested.” Stan gruffly answers for him. “You got a problem with that?” 

“Hmm...” The Hand Witch seems to consider for a moment. “You know, yes actually, I do. Guess I’ll have to take ‘em by force, like I usually do.” She says nonchalantly. 

“Wait, what?” 

The Hand Witch snaps her fingers and some of the hands form large X’s blocking their escape. A shadow casts over them and they turn to see the rest of the hands combining to form one massive hand that towers above the twins. It slowly starts to lean forward, intending to smash down on them. 

“Oh shit—” Stan is cut off when Ford pushes his brother out of its way. Ford dodges with a roll in the other direction. 

The massive hand hits the cave floor with a dull boom. It breaks on contact and the smaller hands scatter in every direction. 

The Hand Witch sighs. “I didn’t want to have to do this to you, but... hands before hunks, as they say.” 

With practiced agility, Ford is able to avoid the hands that grasp for him. Stan, on the other hand, was left staggering from being pushed and was tripped by a hand around his ankle. 

“Agh! Get off me ya little—” Hands gathered to the one wrapped around Stan’s ankle and form a chain from the ceiling. They lifted him off the ground and shook him violently. 

“Stanley!” Ford pointed his staff in the direction of the linked hands. “Glacies Testa!” Stanford shouts the spell and multiple razor-sharp ice shards materialize around the staff’s end before shooting out with deathly quick precision. The shards slice viciously through the hands and let go of Stanley. 

Ford rushes to catch Stan before he hits the ground. Stan wraps his arms around Ford’s neck with a yelp when he falls into his arms. 

“Thanks...” His face reddened a bit as he realized he was being carried bridal style by his brother. 

“Don’t mention it.” Ford replied with an equally red face as he gently let his brother down. 

“Oh my god!” The Hand Witch shrieked also with an apparent blush on her face. “I wish he’d carry me like that,” she mumbled as if she thought they couldn’t hear her. “Oh, the way he fights is so hot. Maybe I can still save this...” She pulls an old book out from her robe that had written on the cover ‘Ye Olde Courtship Stratagem.’ 

Though the Hand Witch herself seemed distracted, her hands quickly reformed themselves into a new battle stance. The hands pulled themselves together tight, coiling like a snake. 

“Heh, you might’a gotten the jump on me.” Stan rolls his shoulder and cracks his knuckles before readying his sword. “But know you’re gonna see what the tumble twins can really do!” 

“Still don’t know where you got that name, but... let’s tumble.” Ford rushes into the battle before he has a chance to feel embarrassed about what he just said. 

The hand snake rushes toward them, but Stan stands his ground and meets its ‘head’ with a brutal swing of his sword. It whips its ‘tail’ in retaliation. Before it can hit Stan, Ford summons rapid-fire fireballs right at it. Stan and Ford fought alongside each other, covering each other’s weaknesses perfectly. The strength of Stan’s blows are a force to be reckoned with, and he is completely immovable facing all attacks head on with his own. Ford is exceedingly quick on his feet, attacking with deadly accuracy before the enemy has the chance to strike. 

“Hey Sixer, how ‘bout an upgrade?” Stan asks with a smirk while their enemy is momentarily stunned by their attacks. 

“Right away.” Ford smiles, already knowing what he means. “Hebere Ignis!” At his shout, the top of his staff heats up and takes on an orange and blue hue. Stan holds out his sword, and when Ford taps the blade ever so slightly with his staff, the blade ignites, becoming engulfed in bright, red-hot flames. 

“Oh ho, yeah baby,” Stan holds his sword aloft and appreciates how cool it looks. “Never gets old.” 

The hand snake shakes off its confusion and lunges forward. With a war cry, Stan delivers the final blow slicing the snake right in half with a bright red flash. The hands go flying in all different directions as Stan victoriously pumps his fist in the air. 

“Yeah! Give me six!” Stan holds his hand up for a high-six. Ford gives it to him with a chuckle before being pulled into Stan’s strong arm for an affectionate noogie. 

As the hands go flying, one of them whizzes right past the Hand Witch’s head and smacks into the wall behind her. She startles, dropping her book. She looks at the hand that hit the wall and gasps. 

“Oh no!” she screeches. “You chipped a nail on my favorite hand! Ah! You know what?! I have had it!” She kicks away the book on the ground and stomps toward them. “I give you drinks, I wear my best rags, and you repay me by throwing hands. Fortress formation, now!” she snaps. 

The still recovering hands scramble clumsily, running into each other and stumbling as the try to follow her command. 

“I said NOW!” 

At her deafening scream the hands hastily circle around the twins at an overwhelming speed. The circle builds up off the ground till the brothers are trapped by towering walls on all sides. Her loyal army of appendages lifts her to the top of the formation on a throne of hands. She glowers down menacingly at them. 

“Okay, so, maybe we celebrated a bit soon.” Stan mutters under his breath. 

“You’re not the only one who can use magic, pretty boy!” She laughs like, well, like a witch. “Spell staff formation,” she states smugly. She sneers at the look of surprise on Ford’s face as her obedient hands create the shape of a magical staff. 

“I mean I’m no magic guy but, is that... actually going to work?” 

Ford can only shrug as he honestly has no idea. 

She lifts the staff above her head. Her eyes roll back into her head and the whites of her eyes and the hand on the end of her staff start glowing. 

“I think that means it working.” Stan says looking nervous. 

The Hand Witch’s voice his distorted and deep when she says: “Rejected was I by the silver fox, so now he’ll suffer my DETURBO VOX!” 

“Oh no, oh god! She’s rhyming now!” 

A purple, sparkling smoke shoots out like a flare from the tip of the staff illuminating the tall ceiling of the cave. The smoke led by the sparkles appears as if it were slithering in the air. Serpentine, it loops and twists when suddenly it changes course and goes straight for Ford. 

“Poindexter, it’s comin’ right at ya!” Stan warns with rising panic in his voice. 

Ford doesn’t have time to rack his brain to figure out if he recognizes the spell or if it’s dangerous. They need to get out of here. They need to get out right now. Ford stabs his staff into the ground at the base of the hand fortress. 

“Fulgur Tempestas!” 

The witch squawks and scrambles out of her thrown before spindly bolts of lightning burst from the ground. The current travels instantly through all the interconnected hands in a blinding flash of light. The fortress starts to fall, but not fast enough because when Ford stops shielding his eyes from the flash, the malicious spell is right in front of his face. 

Ford makes the severe mistake of gasping in surprise. 

The smoke invades his lungs. He chokes on it, panicking as he desperately coughs. His eyes water and he can feel his throat closing. 

“Oh shit,” he barely registers hearing Stan. “Oh no, Ford we gotta go now! Come on, buddy!” 

With the fortress down and the hands uselessly spasming on the ground. Stan loops an arm around his brother’s waist and runs with him. 

“Agh! Seize them!” Stan hears the hag yell behind them. 

Ford trips over his own feet still hacking his lungs out because it’s the only way he knows how to fight the invisible attacker. Stan struggles to run and hold his brother at the same time, he hears something loud behind them. 

“Fuck,” Stan whispers as he tries to move them along faster down the rapidly darkening tunnel. “I know, bud. I know you’re havin’ a hard time, but I need ya to run.” 

Ford tries even though he can’t breathe, he tries because Stanley sounds so worried. He can’t see now either and Stan’s grip tightens on his side, painfully so, but it’s fine because the burning in his side distracts him from the burning in his lungs. 

Something’s behind them now, he can hear it. It sounds like footsteps, the footsteps of something very big. Then there’s a pinprick of light in the distance. 

“The exit, there it is! Almost there, Sixer.” 

But the booming footsteps are getting closer, the light is too though. Just when Ford thinks it’s got them, he feels raindrops on his skin. 

He takes a deep breath of the open-air, thankful he didn’t have to breath musty cave air any longer, and he realizes he isn’t coughing anymore. In fact, his chest doesn’t burn anymore, and his airways feel clearer than ever. As Stanley pants for air next to him, he almost seems more worse for wear than Ford. 

“Stanford, holy hell,” he gasps, gripping his brother’s shoulders. “Are you alright?” 

Stanford nods with a reassuring smile. 

“Really? Are you sure? I saw you breathin’ in that-that purple shit—and really you’re sure you’re fine?” He puts a hand over Ford’s chest gives him a serious look. When Ford responds with putting his hand over Stan’s and the same nod and smile, Stan smiles back. “Well thank god, ‘cause it woulda been real shitty for to get killed by a witch with a hand fetish before we got to the kids.” 

He sighs in relief a content smile on his face and Ford gently squeezes his hand. Stan realizes at this that his hand is still on Ford’s chest and his heart jumps into his throat. Ford has this look in his eyes and it’s so loving and it scares him, so he looks away. 

He has a perfect track record with ignoring these little moments that pass between them and pretending that they don’t happen, so he’s not about to stop now. 

“So,” he clears his throat awkwardly and withdraws his hand from Ford’s. “Gravity Falls, huh? Looks like we finally made it.” 

Sure enough, when they look ahead of them, they can see it; the oddly saucer shaped valley, just like the illustration on the scrolls, stood magnificently before them. It was even more stunning in person. 

“Somehow, we made it in one piece,” Stan puts his hand on his hips looking proud. “You know, it’s odd, I coulda sworn there was something after us back there.” They both stare at the pitch-black void of the cave behind. “Welp! Must have just been my imagina-” 

BOOM! 

Suddenly, a goliath of a monster bursts from the cave entrance. All the hands had formed to make a bipedal abomination. 

“Oh come on, they were just waiting for me to say that, weren’t they?” Stan sighs and begrudgingly unsheathes his sword. “The first fight was kinda fun and all, but I’m getting tired of this. Can ya just zap ‘em with your lightning spell again, Poindexter? 

Ford, agreeing with Stan that this was getting old, sinks his staff in the muddy earth and yells the spell... 

...but for some reason he doesn’t hear himself say it. Hm, that was odd. He tries again. He says the words... but no sound comes from his mouth. 

What is going on? 

The amalgam in front of him reared back its ‘arm’ readying itself to punch. 

“Hey, Sixer? Yeah, that zappy spell would be real good right about now?” 

He’s trying. He’s screaming the spell at the top of his lungs, but somehow, he isn’t making a sound. Screaming doesn’t work, so he attempts to at least whisper. Nothing. 

Why? 

A cry echoes through the valley that isn’t his. The creature stops just as its ‘fist’ is about to come down and it listens too. They all look up to the sky where the sound had come from. 

A jet-black blur flies over them. Lightning streaks across the sky. 

“No way, it’s back!” 

The Thunderbird’s imposing form darts out from the clouds at a break-neck speed. Its feathers crackle with potent energy and it dives right at the hand monster. A huge bolt of lightning strikes the hands dead on with a blaring boom and blinding flash. Its ferocity knocks the twins on their backs and utterly annihilates the hands formation. 

The formation explodes rendering the hands incapacitated. Charred hands are flung in every which direction. 

“Ha...ha ha ha! Thank you, Thunderbird!” Stan calls waving his hand up at their surprise savior. 

The bird lets out a cry that sounds like a clap of thunder and flies off already on its way again. 

“Phew, now that was close!” Stan says with great relief as he gets up and brushes himself off. As his brother helps him up, Ford does not feel eased much at all, however. “Hey, what was that back there?” Stan rests a hand on his shoulder with concern. “You’re not really the type to crumble under pressure so...” 

Ford tries to explain himself. Stan looks completely bewildered as Ford earnestly tries to vocalize; though his mouth is moving, no voice can be heard. He huffs in frustration and he can’t imagine why he’d suddenly lose his voice so completely, unable to even to whisper, it was unusual. Especially after he had recovered from the witch’s— 

And then it hit him. 

A silencing spell. 

~ 

“...And you’re sure we’ll be able to get your voice back if we find some kinda antidote or whatever?” 

Stanford nods as he thumbs through one of his three spell books. He and Stanley had set up camp for the night on the side of the trail. Though he wishes he could have met up with the kids by evening like they’d planned, Ford wanted to be able to give them the warmest of greetings when he saw them for the first time in so long. Not wanting to worry their family with Ford’s sudden muteness, they had agreed to find the antidote tonight and meet the kids in the morning. 

“Hmm,” Stan hums vaguely as he picks up one of Ford’s spell books that is marked on the front with the signature six-fingered hand. Stan flips through the pages with a wary look on his face. “I don’t know... some of these antidotes seem pretty hard to find. Ya sure it’s worth it? The nice and quiet might be nice for a change—” 

Ford punches him in the arm as he guffaws with an exaggerated slap on the knee. Ford groans internally knowing that his brother is going to get his kicks off of his inability to make any comebacks until the very moment they find that antidote. All the more reason to find it as soon as possible, Ford thinks as he turns his attention back to his book. 

Deturbo Vox. It sounded vaguely familiar, but Stanford couldn’t recall anything about its antidote off-hand. 

By now he’s memorized the antidotes of most curses and spells that are dangerous or lethal. He hadn’t bothered to remember the antidote for this curse, so he’s fairly certain its effects aren’t of impending consequence. So, why then had the Hand Witch chosen such an inconsequential spell for revenge? Perhaps just to vex him with finding an antidote that was difficult to obtain? 

Despite the hag’s effort, locating any rare remedy would be no trouble for him, Ford thought smugly. He had studied many a strategy for locating the more elusive antidotes and could identify the precise locations on their map where they could find them. On top of the fact that he is able to cast the highest-level seeking spell there is, there’s no way they won’t be able to find the antidote as long as it is a tangible material which all of them are except...oh no... 

...What if— 

“I found it!” Stan derails his train of thought as he zealously points at an entry in Ford’s spell book. He clears his throat and does a spot-on impression of Ford as he recites the entry, “Deturbo Vox—A low-level silencing spell. Casted primarily by witches/jealous queens past their prime. Those primarily afflicted with this curse are females 18-25, typically of a noble status or maidens longing for a more exciting life. Disciples of higher magic know better to avoid such trivial curses born of pettiness, as its one and only antidote is of the most insulting to the practice of spellcraft. Its antidote is:” Stan gasps suddenly with a dangerous glint in his eye and his face lights up with giddy delight. 

Oh no... 

Ford braces himself for what he knows is coming next. 

“A true love’s kiss!” Stan concludes before doubling over with laughter. 

Ford slams the spell book in his hands shut. 

This is the worst possible outcome. 

Why couldn’t it have been fairy dust or gnome spittle or even unicorn hair would have been better than this. 

“Ha ha! No wonder that old biddy put ya under this curse. She expects ya to crawl back to her for a good ol’ round of spit swappin’.” 

As Stan makes a show of laughing at his brother’s expense, Ford abruptly stands up. He snatches the other book out of snickering twin’s hand and shoves all the books back in his bag, he kicks dirt over the fire he'd made, and begins at a brisk pace down the path. 

“Woah, woah hey! Where ya goin’?” Stan wipes the amused tears from his eyes and hurries after his brother. “Sixer, come on.” He still has a huge grin on his face and is stifling giggles when he catches up to Ford. 

Ford pulls out a ripped-out book page and pen that were currently his only means of communicating. 

‘I figured we could be on way—’ he hastily wrote in cursive that was a little messier than his usual handwriting, ‘—since there is no antidote, we should meet with the children tonight as we’d originally planned.’ 

Stan takes the page and after reading it he puts an arm around Ford’s shoulders stopping them both. 

“What if I told you—” He has a tricky smile on his face like he’s about to try to sell him something. “—that I’ve got the antidote right here.” 

Ford stares at his brother incredulously as his heart instantly starts to hammer in his chest. 

Is he implying what Ford thinks he’s implying? 

No, that’s...he wouldn’t...would he? A dangerous hope begins to bloom in Ford’s chest. 

“Don’t believe me?” When Stan drops his arm from his shoulders, Ford’s first instinct tells him to close his eyes and lean forward. However, Stan merely takes a couple steps back and reaches in his bag in search of an item. 

‘Of course not. Are you out of your mind, Stanford?’ Ford internally berates himself, ashamed to have even entertained the thought. 

Stan sifts through the contents of the bag till he finds what he was looking for. He pulls the object out with an exaggerated swing of his arm like a magician performing an illusion. 

“Ta-da,” He sings as he reveals the object. Ford’s eyes widen in recognition. 

A small bottle with a pink, sparkling liquid inside. The bottle is labelled: LOVE POTION. 

“Yeah, remember this? Remember that cherub I got into a fistfight with? Heh, well, a bloody nose and black eye isn’t all I got from him that day.” 

Ford gingerly takes the bottle and considers his options. 

“With this, the hottest babes in Gravity Falls’ll be all over ya.” Stan continues his sales pitch. “You can take your pick of anyone you want.” 

And isn’t that a nice thought. If he were to drink this, he could expel his irrational, unthinkable feelings and finally experience a normal, acceptable attraction. He might finally be able let go of the impossibility he’s pathetically and desperately held onto for decades. 

He should consider it a godsend, a miraculous way out. It should be a no-brainer, and yet when he looks at Stanley... 

He shakes his head and gives the bottle back much to Stan’s surprise. 

“What?! Why not?” 

‘Because I’m weak and I want to hold on to feelings that will never be returned,’ Ford thinks to himself bitterly. 

“Look, look” Stan says as Ford starts down the path again with a quickened pace. “I know you’ve never really...well, I mean, I know romance has never really been your thing for whatever reason.” 

‘Thank the gods you never figured out the reason.’ 

“But I can help you, brother. See, the key is confidence. Ya gotta be a smooth talker, yeah?” Stan stops him with a hand on his shoulder. “So, let me handle the talking. All you gotta do is stand there and look good, and I’ll be bringin’ ya the babes left and right.” 

Ford didn’t have much confidence in the scheme Stan was trying to talk him into. He was well aware Stan wasn’t as smooth as he thought he was at times. 

“Speaking of...” Stan looks ahead where the path started to run alongside a lake with a homey looking tavern next to it. Two young women are splashing and giggling in the water. He takes out two chalices from his bag and pours a bit of the potion in both. “I’ll give one’a them a drink. You take a swig of this the same time she does and, boom, ya got it made, Sixer.” 

Stan shoves a chalice in his hand and takes him by the arm. Ford tries to protest as he is pulled to the lakeside. 

“Come on at least give it a shot. Or we could go back to the hand hag.” Stan smirks and Ford sighs giving up his protest and letting his brother drag him along. 

The ladies in the lake spot them and one begins to whisper in the other’s ear. 

“Look Ford, a lake.” Stan says, his acting stiff. “Seems like a nice place for us to cool off, wouldn’t you agree?” All of a sudden, Stan takes his shirt off. Ford gives him a bewildered look, having great difficulty not staring at his half naked brother as he feels the heat rise to his face. “I said, wouldn’t you agree?” 

Stan winks at him and Ford realizes that Stan expects him to follow suit and lose his shirt. Ford shakes his head; Stan encourages him under his breath. 

‘Just get it over with,’ Ford thinks as he shyly drops his cloak to the ground and hesitantly lifts his shirt over his head. Ford realizes that Stan is attentively watching him, when their eyes meet Stan looks away awkwardly clearing his throat. 

“Oh hello ladies,” Stan’s acting is still bad but he had seemed to have momentarily forgotten about them. He walks up to the edge of the water and takes a seat in the sand in front of them. “Would you care to share a drink with us?” He hands one of the ladies the chalice, they look at the liquid inside and give each other a bored, unimpressed glance. “It’s sugar free,” he leans forward and adds with a wink, “unlike my brother over here, if you know what I mean.” 

Ford’s jaw drops. The women in the lake mirror his expression only theirs is mixed with shocked amusement. They both start howling with laughter and Ford buries his face in his hands. 

“Yeah, no thanks, grandpa,” the woman holding the chalice says with a laugh before throwing the potion at Stan’s face. Stan sputters as he tries to wipe it away. “I’m outta here.” The woman states before standing up in the shallow water revealing that her lower body and legs were that of a horse. 

“Me too.” The other girl is picked up by the horse girl uncovering her lower half as a fish-tail. 

The horse-woman gallops out of the water with a ‘neigh’. The centaur and mermaid go on their way disappearing into the forest. 

“Guess I’m losin’ my thunder...” Stan gets up with a sigh looking dejected and more than a little embarrassed. Ford felt a twinge of empathy in his chest as the scene suddenly looked awfully familiar. When they were teenagers, they had sneaked into a formal ball for the richest and snootiest. After a lot of urging from Stanley, Ford had given a young noble woman a drink only to have it thrown back in his face. 

He remembered what Stanley had done back then to cheer him up. He walks up to Stan before throwing the contents of his chalice into his own face. He smiles and puts a hand on Stan’s shoulder hoping to convey his appreciation that Stan had made an honest effort for his sake. 

Stan cracks a smile and laughs. Ford mirrors him, his shoulders bounce with silent laughter. 

“Oh, how the tables have turned,” Stan says with a laugh as he slings his arm around Ford’s shoulders. “So, maybe those chicks weren’t into it. So what? There’s a tavern right over there filled with smokin’ babes, who preferably don’t have animal body parts, just waitin’ to fall for our charms.” 

~ 

Stan was slapped so many times that Ford lost count. 

As the sun began to sink low on the horizon, a stubborn Stanley was eventually convinced to call it quits and head into town. Stan had pledged he wasn’t leaving until he found an eligible suitor for Ford, but he eventually conceded when he noticed the buff bartender eyeing them murderously after being told they were trying to give his patrons drugged drinks. 

As they make their way through town, Stan grumbles to himself as he rubs his swollen cheek while Ford takes in the sights of the town. 

Though nothing in the scrolls had suggested that Gravity Falls would be a bustling metropolis, Ford had made the assumption anyway that it would be a wealthy hotspot for mages and investigators of the arcane arts alike due to its high concentrations of weirdness and mana. However, aside from a single lavish and fortified looking castle atop a hill overlooking the town in the northwest, the village on a surface level looks not much different from the plethora of other small, poor forest villages the two of them had visited in their travels. 

Here he was, perhaps the first mage to visit the alleged mana capital of the world, a land full of endless untapped potential, and he couldn’t even use any of his spells. 

Ford doesn’t have time to mull over his frustration as three recognizable figures appear in the distance. Ford’s irritation dissipates in an instant and an overjoyed smile takes over his face. He elbows his brother’s side and when Stan sees their family, his face lights up and he calls to them with an excited wave. 

“Kids!” 

Mabel whips her head in their direction and stops in her tracks where she had been pacing back and forth. 

“Grunkle Stan, Grunkle Ford!” Mabel wastes no time making a mad dash for her grunkles with her arms open wide. Stan and Ford kneel down to catch her in their arms and give her a tight hug. 

“Sorry we’re late, pumpkin.” 

Dipper runs up to them and joins the group hug. 

“About time you showed up.” He says with a smile. 

Soos barrels into them nearly knocking them all over. 

“Hey dads—uh, I mean dudes heh heh.” 

“Yeah, yeah it’s great to see you all too,” Stan says with feigned indifference as he gives Soos a pat on the back. He squirms out of their embrace but fails to hide the happiness in his voice. “Alright, enough of the mushy stuff.” 

“Grunkle Stan, Grunkle Ford, we missed you so much,” Mabel says bouncing up and down, an endless ball of energy. “I missed you so much I knitted you a sweater every single day! I was going to bring them all—” 

“—But they were all so heavy, they weighed the carriage down.” Dipper finishes with an eye roll. “She had to leave some behind—” 

“— But I brought the best one~” Mabel pulls out a huge sweater with cartoony depictions of Stan and Ford on the front; Stan is holding up his sword and Ford his staff with little lightning bolts shooting out. Despite their caricatures looking rather angry in the depiction, there is a big pink heart around both their figures. “I made it big enough so that you can both wear it at the same time!” 

Before Stan can praise her good work between the twins breathless back and forth, Dipper continues with excitement. 

“Oh, Great Uncle Ford look!” He pulls out a blue book with the silhouette of pine tree on the front that is a shiny gold. “I started my own spell book! I’ve been doing a lot of research and I’ve filled up half of it already. I don’t have my own magic staff yet, but I was thinking Gravity Falls seems like the perfect place to find the materials to make one, a-and I was hoping maybe you could teach me a couple spells, i-if you want to I mean.” 

Ford took the boy’s book and skimmed through the pages. He was already impressed with what he could see, Dipper seemed very thorough and it reminded him so much of the books he had kept as a young boy. He wished so desperately he could tell Dipper that he was proud of him. 

Dipper saw the little sad smile on Ford’s face and quirked an eyebrow. 

“Is something the matter, Great Uncle Ford?” 

Ford looks at Stan to let him explain. “Well the thing is, I’m afraid the cat’s got your uncle’s tongue at the moment.” 

Soos gasps. “Oh no, I was worried you dudes would face that cat criminal. I heard about him walking around in boots and stealing—” 

“No, no, not an actual cat. It was a witch, actually. Here’s what happened...” 

Stan goes on to recount their epic fight with the Hand Witch with a little more drama and heroism on his part than was realistic. 

“Wow, that was the most exciting story about three old people fighting in a cave that I’ve ever heard.” Soos says, visibly impressed as he nods in approval once Stan is finished spinning his tale. 

“The curse used on Great Uncle Ford must have been a silencing spell.” Dipper says thoughtfully. “Grunkle Stan, do you remember the name of the spell? We might be able to look up the spell in one of Ford’s spell books and find the antidote.” 

“Way ahead of ya kid,” Stan flashes a wicked grin Ford’s direction and he glares back in warning though it’s futile. “The name of the curse is Deturbo Vox and—heh heh—get this, its only antidote is—” 

“A true love’s kiss!” Mabel shouts, taking everyone by surprise. She grabs Ford’s hands and jumps around delightedly as she squeals. “Oh my gosh, Grunkle Ford! It’s happening, it’s happening! I’ve waited for this moment my entire life!” Stan and Ford share a surprised look. 

“No, come on, Mabel,” Dipper starts. “Of course, the antidote isn’t—” 

“No, that’s... she’s actually right.” Stan confirms. 

“Huh?” Dipper looks completely taken aback. “But... I thought those 'true love’ spells only existed in like...fairytales.” He shakes his head. “Mabel, how the heck did you know that?” 

Mabel is out of breath from all the jumping around she’s doing so it takes a moment to collect herself. “Dipper, please, you know I’m a faithful subscriber to the hottest weekly scroll series around.” She pulls a scroll from her pocket that’s entitled: Ancient Hexes and Voodoo of the Occult—Teenz Addition. “I know all the true love spells thanks to these babies.” She says proudly, waving the scroll. “So anyway, who is it you like, Grunkle Ford? Don’t be shy, you can tell me~” 

“Mabel, he’s physically incapable of telling you. And besides, just because he was cursed with a true love spell doesn’t mean he has a true love—I mean we just don’t know if he does. I’m not saying—” 

“Actually, the spell doesn’t work unless you're in love.” 

“What?” Stan asks incredulously as Soos gasps. 

Ford feels a sudden pit in his stomach. That can’t be right. 

“Yup,” Mabel unravels the scroll and points at the article on Deturbo Vox. Everyone gathers around to see it as Mabel reads a passage, “For whomever is afflicted, those who have the ache in their chest of an affection that is true shall be silenced until the ache is remedied; however, those whose heart is dormant shall succumb to the empty misery and perish.” 

“Wait,” Dipper steps back looking utterly horrified. “That witch could have killed Ford!” 

“But true love saved him!” Mabel exclaims cheerily. “Ah, isn’t love beautiful, bro bro?” She says as she slings an arm around Dipper’s shoulders who looks as if he could throw up. 

“Oh my gosh, dude. This is just like my fanfiction.” Soos says with hushed awe. “Do you know what fanfiction is, Mr. Pines?” Ford shakes his head, still trying to process the information Mabel had just read. “We have much to discuss.” Soos says sagely, putting a hand on Ford’s shoulder. 

Ford’s head is reeling and how could he have not known that? Next time, he’s going to have to think before he writes off a spell he considers at first glance to be petty or insignificant. 

How is he going to explain this to them? What does Stan think? 

He casts his gaze to his brother and when their eyes meet Stan looks away. Ford’s insides twist unpleasantly. 

Did he figure it out? Is he disgusted? 

“So as I was saying,” Mabel goes on unaware of her great uncle’s distress. “Who is it? Is it someone you met on the road? Is it someone we know? Ooo, is it someone we don’t know? Are you gonna confess your love tonight? You should confess tonight. Are you—” 

“Woah, slow down there, hambone.” Soos stops Mabel’s barrage of questions much to Ford’s relief. “These dudes have been on the road for a while, so they probably need some time to unwind. How about we go home and have a nice dinner cooked by my Abuelita?” 

“Okay, fine.” Mabel concedes with mild disappointment in her voice. 

As begin making their way to the shack, Ford gives Soos’ shoulder a gentle squeeze with a smile as a silent ‘thank you’. Soos beams back at him with his gopher-like smile. The younger twins trail ahead of them whispering to each other, not nearly as subtly as they think, no doubt discussing who they think will break Ford’s curse. 

Stan walks alongside Ford in silence the whole way. 

~ 

Ford sits on a tree stump behind the house and he ponders. He racks his brain for loopholes, for alternatives, and explanations. 

He never has to get his voice back, he thinks. He could learn a telepathy spell; there has to be mute mages out there somewhere, ways to cast magic non-verbally. Telepathic communication would be awfully convenient anyway. If no such spell existed, then he could create one. It wouldn’t be the first time he’s invented his own kind of magic, perhaps Dipper could assist him with his fresh, unbiased brilliance. 

As Ford turns this consideration over and over in his head he wonders if it’s entirely childish or perfectly reasonable. 

He doesn’t know what to do. He isn’t panicking now however, how could he when the cool air of the night around him is so calm. In the cabin behind him, his family lay in a peaceful, safe slumber. In front of him, amongst a field of early summer’s wildflowers, hundreds of little lights flicker over the forest floor. The forest fairies flit between the trees, going about their nighttime chores, being lifted in the air on the currents of wind and mana flow in whimsical patterns that almost look like dancing. 

This is a mundane night for them, business as usual, but for human like Ford it is a breathtaking display. It makes Ford wonder if there are things that humans do in their everyday that would appear beautiful to these mystic beings, if his humanity could have the same effect on them that their mysticism has on him. He doubts it as they fly by without paying him any mind. 

The serene haze of his mind keeps him pleasantly distracted from everything else. It makes him think carelessly optimistic thoughts and he wonders if the fairies’ magic is affecting him. 

He doesn’t hear the door creak open nor the footsteps that approach him. Even so, he doesn’t startle when his brother suddenly sits down next to him. 

Stan is silent next to him for minutes, maybe an hour, maybe a second; time is insignificant in the low light of the forest. Ford eventually turns his head to look at him. Stan looks so much like Ford except at the same time he doesn’t at all. Their features were identical, but their expressions never were. Ford loved that; their differences. Individual yet unmistakably bound to one another. Unquestionably two halves of the same whole, they were each other’s. Anyone could see that, when others looked at their faces, the same yet distinct, they knew it too. 

Stan turns and meets his eyes, and Ford doesn’t look away because he doesn’t feel he has to. Stan’s tongue darts out to wet his lips, Ford stares unabashedly. 

“Why didn’t you tell me?” 

For whatever reason, the question makes Ford want to laugh but he can’t. 

Stan hands him a paper and pen. Usually, he would pause and think of how he should answer. Whether to lie kindly or deflect cleverly. He doesn’t think now, the only thing that will come to him in this moment is honesty. 

‘I don’t want you to hate me,’ is what he writes. 

Stan is looking over his shoulder and he answers as soon as Ford finishes writing the sentence. 

“I won’t.” He states firmly. “Not ever, Ford. Not ever.” 

‘Promise?’ 

He answers this time before Ford finishes writing the word. 

“Yes.” 

Ford looks at him. Time doesn’t matter. 

‘Then I won’t hesitate any longer.’ 

He looks confused when Ford removes his glasses. He covers Stan’s eyes with his hand and when Stan doesn’t lean away, he leans forward. 

It’s featherlight and it’s chaste when Ford’s lips meet Stan’s in a kiss. It lasts for a fraction of a second and forever because time doesn’t matter, but it isn’t enough anyway. He wants to push Stan down and find out what his brother really tastes like. He wants to say ‘I love you’ because his voice is back, but the only thing he can compel himself to whisper against the rough skin on Stan’s lips is: 

“I’m sorry.” 

Ford pulls away and his eyes open slowly awakening from the dream of the touch of his twin. 

And suddenly, he’s awake. The gentle shimmer of the fairies is gone, there is only the brutal honesty of the full moon’s revealing light. When he lowers the shield of his hand from his brother’s eyes, the moon’s glow shows him the shock in his widened eyes and parted lips. 

The moon’s light is like a spotlight on him and dread coils in his veins. 

“I’m sorry.” This time he says it on purpose. He panics and stands up, the moonlight follows his every move and the fairies have abandoned him. “Let’s just—” he can’t look at Stanley anymore, the moon can’t look away. “Let’s just pretend that didn’t just happen. Let’s just forget this ever happened. Forget this. Forget it.” 

Forget. He wanted to forget that he ever acted so brashly and selfishly and just blame it on the fairies. Blame it on them and go back inside where the moon can’t see him. He turns his back to his brother, and he leaves. 

Stan grabs his wrist and stops him. 

“I don’t wanna forget.” 

The fairies are peeking out from behind the bushes and trees, he can see them now. Ford turns and his brother grabs both of his arms gently. The moon waits. 

“I don’t want you to forget either.” 

He lifts his hand up to trace Ford’s jaw, he rests his forehead against his twin’s and the moonlight that bathes the both of them casts a single shadow. 

He kisses Ford. There is certainty and there is hunger this time. Time is real again and he knows this one lasts. He knows because he’s breathless and Stan is too. 

"I love you." Ford whispers into his twin’s cheek, his breath and the brush of his lips tickling Stan’s skin. 

“Love you too.” Stan whisper is so quiet, he doesn’t want the fairies or the moon to hear, only Ford. 

The space between them disappears for good. They come together as one, forgetting they were ever separate. The fairies in the brush think it’s breathtaking. 

~The End~

**Author's Note:**

> I'm always open for requests on Tumblr! @dejabooooo


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